vonjacintanandi 08.11.2018


True Confessions from Berlin's slummiest yummy mummy.

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I feel sorry for white men, sometimes. I mean, think of all the white men, fairly intelligent white men, some of them really very intelligent white men, who will tell you, quite, quite earnestly, how easy it is for women and minorities – but most of all, probably women who belong to a minority – to get ahead in the world.

„White men just aren’t being employed at universities anymore,“ they’ll say, sadly. OR: „Actually, it’s not that easy for men, and white men especially, to get published nowadays. It’s very easy for a woman to get published – especially, say, a Muslim woman, or a Muslim-looking woman, at least – especially if she has nice breasts. As long as she puts a picture of herself, smiling, on the cover of her book. But white men? We can’t get published just for being white men, we have to actually have something to say.“

And even when it comes to that, well, erm, not exactly the most lucrative industry in the world, the Lesebühneszene, even here, apparently, women have this huge advantage, as my friend told me once: „Come on, Jacinta,“ he said, „you know the Lesebühne audience prefers to listen to women than to men! Especially if the woman is speaking about sex! You know how easy it’s been for you!“

I always found it surprising, when people said things like this to me, because even though there’s so much discrimination against white men, they seem to be doing okay? Like all the universities seem to be full of white men, loads of published authors seem to be, er, white men, the Lesebühneszene seems to be full of white men. They seem to be holding their own against all this discrimination. It’s funny, though, that one demographic of people could be so discriminated against and then, at the same time, so overrepresented, but I suppose it’s to be expected because, for some scientific reason I can’t go into now, it has been proven that having pale skin and being of the male gender automatically means you are far, far more talented than anyone else.

The thing is everywhere you look there’s a white man, IT’S RAINING WHITE MEN. It’s literally RAINING them. In fact, it’s a Sintflut. It’s an ocean, an ocean of white men. You can’t see where one starts and the other one ends. They’re everywhere.

I don’t really think the „discrimination“ they face (there is no discrimination, it’s just sometimes every now and then a woman or a non-white person or even shock horror a non-white woman writes a book and it gets published or does dance at HAU or wins a poetry slam or something, that’s literally all) is what’s traumatic about the white male experience. I actually think they find it exhausting, thinking they should rule the world. It’s too much pressure, the automaticness of it. I am white, I am male, I should be Donald Trump, I should be a pilot, I should be in a band. I can never just BE. That’s why they send weird hate mail to Margarete Stokowski and Sarah Bosetti, that’s why they can’t bear it when a Muslim wins the Great British Bake-Off or an alien time-lord regenerates into a woman. I think what happens a lot is that white men look around, see how everyone successful is basically white and male, and feel like losers compared to what they should be achieving, and repaint the world inside their heads so it’s more bearable. I think they’re petrified that they’re not allowed to be average. I think when white men complain about discrimination, what they’re really saying is: Make the world fairer, so I don’t have to be a White Man anymore, I can just be me. Let me be me.


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  • Thank you for this article, but I have one question?
    Why do you boldly assume my (white and male) point of view?
    Wouldn` t that be highly offensive, if it were any other position? (For example if I wrote an similar article about woman of colour and their imminent will to prove herself?)

    Best regards

  • Sometimes you feel sorry. The other time, you simply go on hatin‘.

    Very often, I feel ashamed of being a man. I feel ashamed of being white. I feel ashamed of being German.

    I do not feel particularly ashamed of being a WHITE man, because men of colour can be as ashamed of being men as I am.

    I do not feel particularly ashamed of being a white MAN, because white women can be as ashamed of being white as I am.

    I do not at all feel ashamed of being OLD. Why do I say so? You keep saying WHITE MAN, and others say OLD WHITE MAN.

    Because it so easy to have one group on which you can dump everything. Nevertheless, please keep doing so: it keeps reminding me I should never do the same to any group.

    Because it always consists of individuals.

    • But isn’t that the point? Like you’re trying to be kinda facetious and woe is me and sarky about it, but that’s the point right? And one of the reasons it makes white men angry when ppl point out that they’re white men is because they feel like up until, say, three years ago they weren’t white men but „people“ and everyone-else was definable in some way.

      • Yes, that’s the point – I said so myself, and I hope I wasn’t being facetious or sarky or maudlin or whatever: some nuances are bound to be unintentional since English isn’t my native language. What I intended to highlight is: pointing out the majority as definable is necessary because it creates awareness; still, it is double-edged and can reinforce boundaries instead of eliminating them.

        In any case, anybody can be called „white“ or „man“ and asked to think about it, but „white man“ as a category sounds too much like „young muslim man“ or „international jew“ to me.

      • 1.) White privilege is a myth.
        2.) „For the sake of „diversity“ do we need more white people at the, for example, University of Bombay“ said no one ever.
        3).“The thing is everywhere you look there’s a white man, IT’S RAINING WHITE MEN. It’s literally RAINING them.“
        This sentence is racism at it’s best and a crude misuse of the word „literally“. Typical for people who think they are tolerant and progressive.
        4.) It’s okay to be white.

    • But weirdly, as individual as I am, every single time I was really succesful at something, I was told from a very early age, that I had it easy beacause I was a pretty girl. So what’s that individual thing you are talking about? Have you been told all your life that your successes are due to your gender? Because this is so much more likely than the other way round. So being an individual doesn’t really help us here. Women have always been individuals. It didn’t help them to gain the right to vote, nor to gain any power or simple human rights. It doesn’t help them by being booked into Festivals when they are succesful musicians or not getting rape threads when they speak their minds. It also doesn’t help them by becoming CEOs or any other kind of leaders. The only thing that ever helped woman to gain power or justice, is when they gang up together and point out that this is not an individual problem. It’s structural. As are privileges.

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