“To my siblings
I tried to find redemption and failed,
forgive me.
To my friends
the experience [journey] was harsh and I am too weak to resist it
forgive me.
To the world
you were cruel to a great extent,
but I forgive.”*
on earth,
I liked the salty wind of the sea kissing my human face
I liked to look at the turquoise of the blue lagoon
inhaling the mixed smell of spices from Cairo’s Bazaars,
raving with my queers
tasting my mama’s mahshi
making normative spaces queer
“To those who haven’t given up
Love is resistance”
on earth,
I was
a dreamer
a daughter
a sibling
a sister
a friend
a reader
a writer
a lover
a software developer
a community builder
a raver
a runner
a woman
a queer-feminist
a Middle Easterner
in a Western Country
“To those who haven’t given up
Love is resistance”
on earth,
I survived with my queer community’s love
hid my pain behind my joy-spreading smile
to empower earthlings
to make us remember
“we are all lichens”
“To those who haven’t given up
Love is resistance”
on earth,
I swung a flag
the flag of love
the flag of freedom
it was 2017 and
Mashrou Leila was playing live
next I found
my body captivated in dark
it was
electric shocks they applied
to make me unlearn my love
I said
I wanted to unlove power
I wanted to unlove class
I wanted to unlove patriarchy
I wanted to unlove gender binary
but I am a loved one
and a lover
how can I unlearn love?
I can choose to leave this earth
before my time arrives
but
I cannot choose unlearning my love
“To those who haven’t given up
Love is resistance”
On earth,
My love was labelless
My love didn’t judge
My love was me
My love was you
My love was Queer
My love was mum
who passed away
when I was on exile
on earth,
I was left with longing
there is no longing anymore
love wins,
Don’t be sad for me
I am just back to being a stardust
till we meet again
play Amal Hayati
and sing with Umm Kulthum
“Let me dream
Let me
Let me be!”
“To those who haven’t given up
Love is resistance”
“To my siblings
I tried to find redemption and failed,
forgive me.
To my friends
the experience [journey] was harsh and I am too weak to resist it
forgive me.
To the world
you were cruel to a great extent,
but I forgive.”
*Last words of Sarah Hegazy.
